Forgive Me
by twi-fi-90239
Summary: What if Edward didn't know that Bella had Cliff-Dived, what if he never came back, what if Bella and Jacob had become a thing, When Edward runs into Bella and Jacob at College. Can Bella leave Jacob and forgive Edward? ... Better than summary!
1. Preface and Chapter one: College Time

I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT IT ALL GOES TO STEPHENIE MEYER!!!!

Preface:

To loose someone that you love can and will break your heart, but in my case, it almost killed me. I did reckless things just to see his face, but he was never there, not when I needed him most. But there was and is always someone there, his name is Jacob Black, weather I needed someone to hang out with or just a shoulder to cry on. It's been five years since Edward left and Jacob saved me from myself. We have always been friends, but after spending so much time with him we grew closer and closer. And before I knew it, he was the one that I would call my boyfriend. He filled that void that Edward had left. And it still pains me to say his name and kills me to think about him. But I know that Jacob will always be there.

Edward never came back; I waited one whole year before I would admit he would never come back for me and that he won't be looking for me and worst of all that he didn't love me. After that year I finally agreed with my heart that Jacob was always going to be there and that inside me I did love him. Not as just a friend like it has always been, but as a significant other. Now, after waiting a couple years for Jacob to finish school, we are going to college, together.

I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT IT ALL GOES TO STEPHANIE MEYER!!!!

Chapter One:

"JACOB, LET'S GO!"

"Hold on a minute Bells, let me take a shower, you know I was up late last night."

Jeez, he was always running late, he knows we have to leave early but no he had to stay up all night and run around like a wolf. Typical Jacob never listens to you when you tell him what he HAS to do. Even from me, you would think that he would be right there when I told him I loved him. That's always the card I pull when I want him to do something because he waited so long to hear me say it. But I do understand wanting to be with the tribe because he is going to be so far away, all the way in New Hampshire.

"I'm Done, I'm Done!"

"Well Then Hurry up we need to get to Dartmouth, we only have a week before school starts and I want to get there and set up."

"I'm hurrying … Okay I'm here!"

"Good now let's go we need to go and say bye to Charlie and Billy."

Charlie was at Billy's "watching a game" when even _I _ knew there wasn't a game on at six o'clock in the morning. As Jacob had said "there two old men, they are going senile, they are probably watching a black screen." But I knew exactly what they were doing. They were planning a Good Luck Party. And Charlie thinks I have NO idea but I know, I saw the decorations when I was in his closet getting his dirty laundry last Friday.

"Okay to my dad's then the highway, right?"

Yes, Jacob as I told you a million times last night we are going to see Billy and Charlie then we are hitting the highway. Do you ever listen?"

"Of course I listen to you; I listen to you when you tell me you love me."

"And that's it? In one ear out the other."

"Pretty much."

"JACOB"

"Honey I am just kidding I know everything you say. I love you!"

"I love you to."

"Let's just do this and get to Dartmouth, okay"

"Okay Bells."

We were right down the street from Billy's house and when we pulled in there was Emily's car. I figured that only she was the one who had driven because the pack had paws. The house looked dark like no one was in there. Jacob and I got out of the car and walked up to the door. We knocked, no answer, knocked again, again no answer. Jacob got the spare key under the door-mat, seeing as he doesn't need a key anymore because I and he moved in an apartment last year, and unlocked the door. It was pitch black and all of a sudden lights went on and everyone screamed "GOOD LUCK!" I jumped back about a mile and almost fell. But of course Jacob caught me by my hand. Not like Edward I thought. I felt a wave of depression go over me, but I put on my _happy _face for Jacob, I couldn't let him know I was feeling for Edward too. Although he knew, I still woke up in the middle of the night screaming and crying. Jacob was always there to calm me and tell me it was okay. I love him so much. I never would have thought in a million years that Jacob would be with me.

I almost forgot where I was until Charlie had said with a laugh, "Congratulations you two, you better get straight A's!".

"Thanks dad."

"Yea, Thanks Charlie."

"Hey dad, where's Billy?"

"Oh, Billy he is … in the bathroom." But he had said it more like a question instead of a statement.

"Well are you two just going to stand there or are you going to open your presents?" Of course Charlie was all chipper this morning.

"There are presents, but it's not even that big of a deal, were just going to college." Jacob said with a laugh.

"Yes, Jake there _is_ presents, and you're not _just _going to college, this is a big step in your life."

"God dad you sound like I'm going to become a doctor."

"Yea, but if it was _my_ way you would be going to be a doctor. How do you expect to take care of me when I get older and even more cripple." Billy laughed.

"Speaking about that, who is going to take care of you Billy while both of us are away?"

"Bella, I am a grown man I think I can take care of myself, even in a wheelchair. But just incase I need anything I have the pack. Right guys?"

"Right" the pack had said.

"Right" Sam repeated in an Alpha type of way letting everyone know that they _**will**_ be taking care of Billy.

"Okay well enough chit-chat we have to hit the road."

"But bells you have until the end of the week for school to start, can't you spare a few more minutes with your old man?"

"Of course dad, whatever floats your boat."

"Thank you sweetie."

"No problem dad."

"PRESENT TIME!" someone had yelled. It was Emily

Emily and I had grown very close since Jacob and I became a thing.

"Okay, Okay"

"Who's fist?"

"ME!" - Charlie.

"Alright. Pass it over."

"Here you go."

As I opened the wrapping paper, I realized what it was. It was keys. Keys to a house or an apartment it looked like.

"What is it to dad?"

"It is keys to your new apartment, a block away from school. That way you won't have to live around people you don't know, so that you will have privacy, and most of all so you will be safe."

"THANKS DAD!"

"Yea, thanks Charlie."

"Alrighty, I think Jake should choose who's to open next."

"Jake?"

"I want to open my dad's."

"Okay son, here you go son."

"Oh My GOD!"

"Dad are you serious?!"

"Yup."

It was a check for $10,000!

"Now this is to buy stuff for your new apartment! If you have left over money you can use it for whatever you want. You understand."

"Mhm."

"Bella make sure it is spent on apartment things."

"Sure Billy."

Me and Jake opened presents from everyone. Emily, Sam, Paul, Jared, Embry, Quil, Seth, and Leah.

We got, more money, various knick knacks from everyone, and most important a gift card to the grocery store for $400. That was from Emily, of course.

Before we new it, it was 8:30 and we had to get a move on. It was hard to say good-bye to everyone because we all grew very close. But the most painful one was Charlie, his face had pain written all over. When I had given Billy my last good-bye I had asked him to look after Charlie even though it should be the other way around. And Billy being Billy, agreed.

With the last good-byes, I love you's, and keep safes. We were off. Me and Jacob!


	2. Chapter 2: New home, old flings

I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT IT ALL GOES TO STEPHANIE MEYER!!!!

Chapter 2:

The only bad thing about me driving and Jake sleeping is that _**I**_ get lost and well Jake is useless, well except for the fact that I don't need to put the heat on. I got about 30 minutes away from the new apartment that Charlie had bought us and ended up taking the wrong turn and went backwards. I didn't realize it until I saw the same Harley Shop we had passed 50 minutes earlier. Great, now I have to wake up Jacob, how cranky will he be now?

"Jake, wake up. Honey, wake up please."

"Five more minutes dad."

"JAKE!"

"I SAID FIVE MORE MINUTES DAD!"

"IT'S BELLA, WAKE THE HELL UP!"

"What Bella!"

"Uhmmm…"

"Um what, what's wrong?"

"I kinda got lost."

"What do you mean _kinda_?"

"I mean totally lost."

"And how did this happen?"

"I took the wrong turn and turned us around."

"Okay, let me drive."

"Thanks hon."

"Yup."

After an hour more we stopped at the gas station so I could call my dad. Neither Jake nor I remembered the address. Come to think of it I don't even think that Charlie gave it to us.

After four rings he picked up.

"Hey Bells, homesick already?"

"Of course, but that's not what I want to talk about, what's the address to the new apartment?"

"Oh, sorry honey it is…" Shuffling papers "4 Morrison Road"

"Thanks dad."

"No problem, call me when you get there… okay?"

"Okay"

"Bye."

"Bye dad."

After I told Jake, he said that we were about 15 minutes away. When we got there we were both star struck. It was nothing like we had expected. It wasn't an apartment building, it was a duplex. And gosh was it beautiful, it looked like a mansion. Well at least we would have room. Not that we really needed it. When we went inside it was just as beautiful as the out. We had also met the neighbors while we were unpacking my truck and the uhaul connection, and they were kind enough to ask if we needed help. They were about my age. And in the same college. So at least we now know someone.

When we were setting up the kitchen there was a note. It Read:

_Congratulations you guys me and Charlie, and Renee are so proud of you!_

_Now Bella here is something to help you out with Jake's eating habits …_

_Open the Fridge and then keep reading._

We did as we were told.

"Oh My God! Jakey come and look at this!"

"Holy WOW!"

"I KNOW!!!"

The Fridge was packed!!! With almost everything you could think of!

_Now if you did like I told you, you now see the whole fridge and freezer are packed._

_I thought it was the least I could do for you especially Bella!_

_The cabinets are also full. _

_The gift card that Emily gave you guys will also help._

_No Jake be good and don't eat everything in one night!_

_You guys know that you can call if you need anything._

_Keep in touch_

_Love,_

_Billy – Dad and Charlie (although he does not know that this note is here) _

Jake wrapped his arms around my body and I felt so happy to have made it here. Not right out of my high school years and not right out of Jake's. We had a few years together so it was not a rush thing. As I turned around to see Jake he kissed me, caught me right off guard. We kissed for a few minutes and then he just looked at me.

"What was that for?"

"It's because I love you, I can't just kiss you?"

"No you can kiss me, as a matter of fact you can kiss me all you like."

"Oh really."

"Mhm… but not right now I have to go unpack."

"Well, our room, the living room, and the bathroom is already done."

"Really but we just got here like thirty minutes ago."  
"No actually it's been like an hour and thirty minutes."

"Really? Are you lying?"

"No."

I stood there laughing and Jake had absolutely no idea what in the world was going on. So I told him that I was laughing because of absolutely no reason. And it wasn't the truth. I was laughing to cover up my pain. I was in pain because it reminded me of Edward how he would be done with anything fast. And to me it was light speed because I was talking to Jenny our new neighbor and her boyfriend Colby. After a few minutes of laughing I felt better because Jacob was smiling reminding me that I have him. After a moment of looking into those eyes, I jumped on Jake and started kissing him. Kissing him senseless.

"I could get used to this. I think I am going to unpack boxes more often."

"Ha-ha … so funny." I responded in a sarcastic tone, but I stayed in his arms.

"So there are a few more boxes in the living room. I think I should go unpack them."

"OH, no you don't!"

"Why?"

"Because I think we need to make-out a little more."

"I'm good with that."

We ended up making out for an hour or so, we were rudely interrupted by the door-bell. It was Jenny and Colby.

"Hey guys I though I would come over and ask if you wanted to go to one of the before school parties at the sorority houses. But we don't know anyone in a sorority so we can't get in." I had told them

"Well you may not but I do and I think I can get you guys in. Just let me go and get you an outfit that I think you should were and Colby will get one for Jacob. If you wanna go."

"I'll go if Jake wants to…. Jake?"

"Sure"

"Okay then we'll be right back."

"Want to continue what we were doing while they go and get our outfits?"

"MHM." He said with a **huge** grin.

So while they got our outfits together me and Jake continued to kiss. Feeling his warmth was like home, like something I won't ever forget. No matter how long I am away. But then again that is what I had said about Edward. Then the bell rang again distracting my thoughts and my kisses.

Jenny gave me a bag and Colby gave Jake a bag. They told us to hurry so we weren't late. As we were walking towards our bedroom, Jake heard Colby say … " How long do think they will be?" Jenny responded " Well that depends on how Jacob liked her outfit" Colby- " Well great we will be gone in a bout 365 days." " It's not my fault I have clothes that'll make her twice as pretty." That last comment mad me smile a bit as Jake told me.

As I took out the clothes in the bag I was shocked, now I get what Jenny was saying. She packed me a red long-sleeved almost see through low-cut shirt. A black leather mini skirt with black fishnet stockings, and red stiletto heels. God now I look like a tramp, or so I thought until I saw the red tank top that'll cover more and another pair of stockings I could use regular nude color ones. Thank God! She also packed me black eyeliner and eye shadow and light pink lip gloss. I though I looked pretty good. That was until I stepped out of the bathroom into my room.

Jake wore a black V-neck t-shirt, washed out jeans, black boots, and a black leather jacket. When Jake turned around and looked at me he stared and I stared. We were stuck there for a good 3 minutes. Then there was a "COME ON GUYS!"

"We should get going Hun."  
"We'll be there in a few minutes. Hold on." Jake called back

He looked at me one more time and in two long strides made it over to me. He picked me up and kissed me. He wouldn't let go until I stopped kissing him.

"What's wrong babe?"

"Nothing whatsoever but there getting aggravated."

"Fine." He had said with a sigh."

"Finally there back, now let's go."

"Oh my god you guys look hot." Jenny had said.

"Yea there hot now let's go." Colby said in a rude tone.

"Okay let's go."

When we got there it was packed and like Jenny told us we got in without a problem. The only problem we had at first was all the guys checking me out and all the girls checking out Jake. We both got a little jealous but then laughed at each other. We got in line for beer and I was just looking around and I saw her. I couldn't believe it I couldn't move. She was looking in the other direction, thank god. It was Alice! But wouldn't she of known I was here? No of course not Jacob blocks her power. I wanted to run up to her, hug her, and cry in her arms. But I knew they didn't love me anymore they didn't want to see me they didn't care if anything happened to me. When my legs could move I ran to Jake.

"Jake" – I whispered

"What, why are we whispering?"  
"They are here?"

"They who."

He saw the pain on my face and stood there frozen for a minute.

"The Cullens are here?"

"Yea, I saw Alice."

"Did she see you."

"No."

"Good, and because of me she won't know you're here or were here."

"Okay let's go."

We went to find Jenny and Colby and tell them were leaving. When we found them they told us to go ahead and we could keep the clothes. She gave me a little wink when she told us. We said thank you and we headed out.

When we were walking back to the apartment, there was a sliver Volvo and a black Mercedes in the driveway 5 houses down. Great, they didn't know we were here but we can't hide from them forever. Jake didn't see the cars but I did. I saw a light on in the house and I saw him. The one I have been trying to forget. He was sitting at his desk, his head in his hand. I looked toward Jake and put my finger over my mouth. He knew that meant to keep quite. We walked into the house and he looked at me.

"Are you okay?"

"Yea, I love you I'm fine."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes Jake I am sure."

"Now, let's go upstairs and go to bed, I am tired. Moving in and then a party. I'm exhausted!"

"Okay."

When we got upstairs we laid down and I didn't cuddle with Jake tonight. Usually he would get upset but he understood. And surprisingly he didn't say anything mean about them tonight. I know he loves me and he has learned I don't like when he says bad things about them. We really don't talk about them.

That night I had a dream no a nightmare, the same one I had for two years after the Cullens moved away, I woke up screaming and Jake was there to comfort me. I fell asleep again and it was just a blank dark dream, nothing, nothing at all.


	3. Chapter 3: I love you? I hate you?

I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT IT ALL GOES TO STEPHANIE MEYER!!!!

Chapter 3:

So much had happened in just one day of being in our new home. My heart had stopped so many times in one day. First, the party at Billy's, then the accident of getting lost, the apartment, the sorority party, seeing Alice, and the longest of them all seeing Edward.

I pondered over how we could have both ended up in the same place at the same time. And then I remembered the reason for coming here was the hope of seeing Edward again. Ever since he had said we should enlist in Dartmouth I had wanted to come here. That was a big mistake. I am with Jacob Black, not with Edward Cullen. I have to remember that Edward doesn't love me, he left me. And for that reason I have to stay far away from Edward. He cannot know that I am here. Although that might be pretty hard seeing as he lives right down the street from us. And I _**cannot**_ show Jacob the pain I am feeling and the urge to run up to Edward's house and kiss him and be in his arms again. I can not break Jacob's heart. Not again.

When morning had rolled around, I was miserable. I didn't get much sleep, I either woke up with a nightmare as a dream or nothing but black as a dream. Both were scary, I didn't know what to do. I rolled over and Jacob wasn't there. I got out of bed and looked around the house, Jacob wasn't there. I felt like Edward had left me all over again. The hole in my chest that Jacob had sealed was now open and bleeding pain all over again. I curled up in a ball on the couch, afraid that Jake had left me. Then the door had opened and slammed.

"Stupid bloodsucker, how dare he, he must have known we were here with that future seer, stupid leeches. UGH!"

I was quiet when he had walked in and he must not have seen me because I was curled up. When he had said those words I balled, I couldn't help myself. He ran over to me and picked me up he kept on apologizing.

"I didn't know you were out here I thought you were still in bed. I am so sorry I didn't want you to hear those words, I am so sorry honey."

"I-it wa-wasn't what you sa-said. I th-thought you le-left me." I had told him through sobs.

"I wouldn't ever leave you. Why would you think that?"

"Because those are the same words Edward had told me. And he left me, why did he leave me?"

"I don't know why, he was sure stupid to leave you, I wouldn't leave you if my life depended on it."

"I know Jake, I love you, I am sorry you have to see me like thins. I thought I could deal with it, but that hole he left me with opened when I saw him."

"Wait a minute you saw him?"

"Yes, in his room."

"Did he see you?"

"No, his head was in his hands."

"It's okay, do want to move?"

"No I don't want to do that to you."

"Okay, just tell me if you want to leave and we will. Okay?"  
"Yea, thank you Jakey."

"No problem."

As the day drug on me and Jake finished unpacking the little that had to be done and setting up.

"Jake, I am tired I think I am going to lie down. Do you need me?"

"Always, but no go ahead and lie down, I was going to go and roam the town."

"Okay, have fun, love you."

"Love you too, call you later."

"Okay."

I went in my room to go and lay down and noticed there was a box that had not been open. It said "**Bella's old stuff, do not open!**" written across the top. I sat down on the floor with it and opened it. I couldn't breath when I saw what was in it. The top had just been baby pictures and blankets, but the bottom was everything that I thought Edward had taken away from me. My pictures of him, my cd, my plane tickets, all my presents from that horrible night. I couldn't help it but cry, cry, and cry some more. I was debating on whether or not I should run over to his house. I decided not to. I cried myself to sleep. I ended up only sleeping for two minutes. Something took over my body, I didn't know what but I screamed!

"EDWARD, EDWARD I NEED YOU, I AM RIGHT HERE 5 HOUSES DOWN. COME HERE!"

I don't know what took over me. It was weird. Then all of a sudden it came over me again.

"EDWARD CULLEN IT IS ME BELLA 4 MORRISON ROAD! COME HERE!

I was freaked out that those words cam out of my mouth I didn't mean to say them, or scream them for that matter. I knew he would here me the question is, will he actually come, probably not. Then all of a sudden I heard the door swing open and within a thirtieth of a second, he was there. Right in front of me. He scooped me up and wouldn't put me down; he kissed me and wouldn't stop. A part of me didn't want him to stop, but that little part of me was _screaming _at me to stop.

He finally stopped and moved to my neck. I yelled at him to stop, and he did. He put me down and those perfect eyes, golden, peered at me. I was dazzled, but only for a moment.

"EDWARD HOW DARE YOU, HOW DARE YOU COME INTO MY HOME AND DO THAT TO ME!!! WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH YOU?!"

"Bella, it is really you."

"OF COURSE IT IS ME BUT YOU DIDN'T ANSWER MY QUESTION!"

"I'm sorry I don't know what came over me, I came here because you called me, I thought I was hearing things, but then Alice came to me and asked me If I heard that, and I knew I wasn't hearing things so I came over as fast as I possibly could. I am so sorry I left you I don't know why I did I am so stupid. Please, I know you probably don't want to forgive me or see my face but I am so sorry I will leave if you tell me to. And I will stay if you tell me to. What do you want?"

I could tell in his eyes the pain he was feeling, but the rage in myself was overpowering me, I really wanted to kiss him, to be with him forever. But I had Jacob. Edward wasn't there when I needed him. He left me. And for that I was mad, no beyond mad, I was pissed off!

"YOU WERE NOT THERE WHEN I NEEDED YOU; DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHAT I WENT THROUGH? JACOB BLACK WAS THERE TO KEEP ME SAFE AND TO SAVE ME FROM MYSELF. When you left you know who was there? JACOB! The evil wolf, in your head, but in my head he is my boyfriend."

I realized that last word struck a nerve, pain crossed his face, I know he wanted to say something but he kept him mouth shut and let me talk.

"He let's me cry over you almost every night and he doesn't even get mad. But last night when I saw Alice at that party-"

"WAIT, you saw Alice?"

"Yes, and I saw you in your house, you head in your hands. All the nightmares I had when you left, which I had for two WHOLE YEARS!, came back!"

"I am so, so, so sorry Bella, it thought me leaving was the best decision."

"Well I got news for you, it wasn't. Now can you please leave Jake will be back soon, and I cant handle everything right now."

"Yes."

As he was walking out the door, I whispered "I do still love you Edward Cullen. And I love Alice, please tell her that, and the rest of your family." I know he heard me, with his super sonic vampire hearing, then I heard he door close.

About thirty minutes later the door opened again, and Jacob yelled that he will be back in ten more minutes.

When he came back, he yelled again to me that he had dinner. When he had mentioned dinner, my stomach growled. I told him that I will be right there. I just had to use the bathroom, I went to go and make sure I looked presentable. When I walked back into the bedroom I hid the box that had all those memories under the bed. I walked into the kitchen to see a candle lit dinner with … subs. I started to laugh and he said "I know, I know. If I had all day I would have made a nice dinner for us."

"Its okay hun, it is wonderful."

"Thank you, now lets eat, I am starving."

At the end I at three quarters of mine and Jake at 3 and the rest of mine.

The phone rang and Jake answered it. It was Jenny and Colby, they told him that there was another party if either of us wanted to join them.

"Jake, really go, enjoy yourself, I am exhausted and I know you want to go, so have fun, and just call me every little while. Okay?"

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, now GO, before I have to kick your furry little wolf butt!"

"Alright, love you."

"BYE."

"Bye."

After Jake left, I cleaned up the kitchen, then I called Charlie and Renee. I was going to go and head off to bed, but I wanted to set up some things for the beginning of school. And I left to go to the mall so I could go and get a few more shirts and pants. I was wondering how the Cullens were going to go to school if it is light out, then I remembered Edward saying something about night school.

Finally it was 8:30 and I headed off for bed. Around 9:00 Jake called and said he was going to another party with Jenny and Colby, and that he probably won't be back until about 1:30 or so. I told him that is was fine and have fun but not to much fun. When we hang up I finally actually fell asleep.

I woke up startled to a crash in the lamp next to Jacob's side. But I knew Jake wasn't home it was only 10:30. So I got up to investigate. No one was here. Well that you could see. I called his name.

"Edward get out here, I know that you are here."

And just like I suspected Edward was there hiding in the closet.

"I thought I told you to stay away!"

"I know I'm sorry."

"Well, you should be, why are you here anyway?"

"Because I missed you, I have waited five long years to see you. You still smell the same and surprisingly look the same, you would think that you were still stuck in time. But obviously you are not because I can smell your blood and my throat is burning. But I would rather that that have to live one more day not seeing you. And don't worry I am well fed tonight." He had said that last sentence with a nervous laugh.

"Well, what if Jacob was here? Did you even think about that?"

"Yes, and I knew he wasn't here. I left your house but not your property. I'm sorry. Not much has changed, you still talk in your sleep."

"Oh god what did I say?"

"You said how much you missed me, that you love me, and that you still want to be with me." He was smiling now. "Then you were saying how much pain I caused you." Pain washed through his face, I felt like crying. "I didn't realize how bad I had made your life, I am truly sorry."

"I know, I am sorry I am being so rude, but I am with Jake now and I don't want to break his heart."

"I know, I am sorry, if you don't want me then tell me."

"I can't. But I can tell that I need you to leave, or at least leave until I am asleep and make sure Jake doesn't know that you are here."

"I love you Bella."

"Bye Edward."

"Bye."

As he crept out of the window -how ironic- I whispered "I love you too."

I knew that he would be back, and I tried not to think about it, I wrote Jake a note and left his nightstand it read:

_I love you._

That night I slept peacefully, without a nightmare. Jacob came in around 12:30. He thought I was asleep but he kissed me and whispered "I love you too, sweetie."


	4. Chapter 4: I'm Sorry

I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT IT ALL GOES TO STEPHANIE MEYER!!!!

**Thank you to my BFF Mandi for letting me use your name, she loves Jacob so here you go, your dream come true! LOVE YOU (as a friend way)!!!!**

Chapter 4:

I woke up at 6:30 this morning. I slept peacefully, no nightmares, I was surprised, even if I don't wake up screaming I am usually having a nightmare. I have had no good dreams since Edward had left me. And I had slept with a nice dream, no a WONDERFUL dream. I was happy to see Edward in my arms but in my other I had Jake, oh how I wish it was that easy. I let Jake sleep in late today, he was out late.

I walked into the kitchen to make me some breakfast and guess who I see standing there, no more like bouncing? I saw Alice.

"BELLA!!!"

"Shh, Jake is asleep."

"Sorry." She said with a frown.

"Oh Alice I missed you so much." I ran into her arms and breathed in her familiar scent.

"I missed you too. I am so sorry I didn't get to see you before we left, I didn't want to go, and I am so so sorry will you forgive me?" She said with a glorious smile.

"Of course I forgive you!"

"So why didn't you come and see me when I was at the party? Edward told me that you were there and saw me."

"Because I thought you didn't love me, you did leave me."

"Not at my own will."

"What?"

"Eddie Boy told us that we had to leave, and he gave absolutely no explanation. I mean I know that Jasper had almost killed you. But he recovered. I AM SO SORRY!"

"It's okay. I know now that he was only protecting me."

"So are you going to take him back?"

"I don't know I mean I want to but I can't just leave Jake, he took care of me when you left me, I tried to basically kill myself when you guys left."

Alice hissed when I said that, and in that instant the door flew open and Edward was there.

"YOU WHAT!" He screamed, he looked totally hot doing it though, but he couldn't know that.

"QUIT! Jake is asleep!"

"Oh Bella I can't believe I did this to you! I am so sorry." He looked like was on the verge of crying – if he could. "Please tell me why."

"Because it was the only way to hear your voice."

"Huh" They both said at the same time.

Then I went into the whole story about doing reckless things made me hear his voice. As I was telling them this, Alice face said Oh my god she is crazy, but I love her, oh and I was right we shouldn't have left. I can only imagine what she was thinking to Edward. As for Edwards face he looked like he was going to cry only if he could, he looked so pained and troubled. About half way through it thought he hissed at Alice, and she had said that she was sorry. Must have been something she was thinking. After I finished Edward had picked me up and tried to kiss me but I wouldn't let him. He asked what the problem was. I lied; I told him that it was because I couldn't handle all the drama in the morning. When the truth was that I wanted to hold him and never let him go but I couldn't, I had Jake.

As I let Jake sleep, I was cleaning not like there was much to do but whatever I just wanted to get Edward off my mind. But I couldn't. Around 10:30 Jake rolled in and picked me up and plopped us on the couch. He started kissing me, then he rolled on top of me and I wanted him to stop. I didn't say or do anything, but in my heart I knew it wasn't right.

"Jake?"

"Hmm." He said while kissing my neck

"Not right now, I just … I am tired. I couldn't sleep."

"Its okay, I understand."

"Do you want to go to bed?"

"No I will survive. But I think I am going to go out, I will let you do whatever, I just want some time, and I have things to think about."

"Are you going to leave me?"

"NO! Why would you even think that?"

"Because of that bloo - Edward."

"No I won't leave you."

"Good." He had said and started to kiss me again.

"JAKE! Please stop."

"Sorry."

"Its alright."

"Now Bella get going and be careful."

"Who me be careful, I am indestructible." I said with a laugh

"Okay whatever."

"Bye hun."

"Bye."

With all those words said I was on my way. I hopped into my truck. And I was headed for the mall. I got down the road and all of a sudden someone popped into the road. I should have known it was him. Edward. Was he ever going to give up? I kept on driving just imaging he wasn't there. Or so I though. He stopped me care, just as he had stopped that van those many years ago. That was gonna leave a mark.

"YOU ASS!"

"Sorry. I didn't know it was going to actually damage your car." He commented with a laugh. Then he popped out the dent.

"Why cant you leave me alone?"

"Because, I love you."

"Oh yea you so showed that when you left me."

I didn't mean to put pain on him, oh wait yes I did.

"I am so sorry, what is it going to take for you to trust me?"

"I don't know Edward, you leaving me alone."

"I can't."

"Why? Why Edward, Why cant you. Don't you see me and Jake together? Cant you see how much you damaged me? You really want to know what I did."

"No, not really."

"Well just leave me alone for now okay?"  
"Fine."

"I love you."

"BYE!"

As he walked away I whispered "I love you." He turned around for an instant and smiled. I almost got out of the car and ran up to him, but I didn't.

Through out the day, I had to gone to many stores, I got many blouses (blue, just to piss of Edward and make him regret leaving), and many jeans.

When I walked up onto my front steps, I noticed a dozen flowers Freesia, my favorite, and a note that said "I'm Sorry." In Edward's perfect calligraphy. Then there was a little box, I opened it and it had topaz earrings. I walked out back into the woods and Edward to come here now. Of course he did. And when he did he thought I was happy. So instead of saying anything he picked me up and kissed me, oh how I missed his lips on mine. I didn't make him stop, which I should have, but I didn't. Then, he didn't stop, he laid me down on the ground and I hadn't realized there was a picnic type blanket on the ground. It was like anything I would have wanted but, now I didn't well that was a lie I did but not like this not when me and Jake were together. He eventually moved down to my neck, he kissed my collarbone and I told him to stop. Surprisingly he did. I told him "NO!" and I threw the things he gave me and ran, I said "DON'T FOLLOW ME!" I didn't realize I was crying until I unlocked the door. I wiped me eyes and I checked my self in the little mirror I carried and I looked fine, not like I had been crying, THANK GOD!

When I opened the door I realized there was more freesias, laid out like in a romantic movie, but it is like when they lay out a bunch of roses for you to follow. And so I did. They stopped right in the kitchen. It was candle lit and it smelled delicious. He stood there looking Sexy as ever and he said. "I told you it would have been better if I had time to cook a good dinner." "Oh God Jake, I can't believe this." "Well, I figured that I could make you feel a little bit happier." "I know, now let's eat. It smells delicious."

When we were finished I started to clean up and Jake had come up behind me and made me drop dishes. He turned around started kissing me. He picked me up, and headed into the living room. He let me breath by kissing my neck. Then he kissed me on my lips. We continued to kiss for a while then he started to move to my shirt and started to unbutton it. I didn't make him stop because I knew that Edward wasn't there, or I thought that at least. Until, both Jake and I had heard a loud growl. He stopped and we looked over the couch and Edward was standing there, I was glad that I had decided to put on a tank top underneath my shirt.

"Get AWAY FROM HER!" Edward had screamed at Jake.

"You have NO right to be in here, get out of here bloodsucker, _BEFORE _I rip you to shreds and burn the pieces."

"NO! You get away, you could kill her if you get angry, and you are dangerous."

"YOU ARE SUCH AN IDIOT. YOU COULD KILL HER TOO, MORE OFTEN THAT ME!"

"ENOUGH, you two are idiots, both of you GET OUT! NOW! OUT OF MY GOD DAMN HOUSE!"

"But-"

"NO DON'T FREAKIN BUT ME EDWARD! I TOLD YOU TO LEAVE ME THE FRIG ALONE!"

"Honey-"

"JAKE GET OUT! BOTH OF YOU!"

"It's your entire fault you stupid leech."

"GET OUT NOW!"

As they left, I had started to relax. They are so stupid. I had called Jake's cell phone and told him he could come back. When he had gotten back I had told him that I was sick of this, and that it was okay. So after an hour we were good.

When I had woken up it was around noon, Jake was up. The rest of the day was fine, we just relaxed.

Jenny had stopped by to ask us to the last big party before school started. She had also told us that her sister Amanda, or Mandi, with an I, is stopping in to town and will be at the party.

So, I had put on everything that she had given me except I switched the red top for identical one in blue with a blue tank top I had saw shopping, and the black stilettos from prom.

So me and Jake where off to the party with Jenny and Colby. And Mandi was going to meet up with us later. Jenny said me and her were going to hit it good. It is really nice to know people who can show you around.

When we had there it was packed even more than before. You could barely move. But hey, it was still a party. I was going to try and have fun.

I and Jake had danced for a while; we were having a lot of fun. Jake and Colby had gone off for, I don't even know what. Probably to get beer. Jake knows he could go to jail but of course he could pass as 21.

After they had left, I and Jenny had danced, like sluts of course. I usually don't dance but I was getting used to it. After about fifteen minutes, I had to get away from the noise, so I had headed to the sorority kitchen. When I got there I had sat down. Then all of sudden guess who ran in. Edward. He came over to me and grabbed my phone and crushed it in his hands. And before I could even think about going out the door he was in front of it. And he knew that I would not be able to get pass him. Obviously.

"What do you want?"

"You."

"You really showed me that when you left me."

"I was trying to make you safe again."

"Well you did far from that Edward."

"I know."

"NO! You don't. I almost killed myself and then Victoria and Laurent came back for me and the pack had gotten them before they could get to me. And my heart was not whole, Jake still doesn't even fill the hole completely and I have to tell him he does and even he knows he doesn't."

"Why won't you leave me alone?" By then I was in tears.

"I can't loose you again, I _**do**_ understand the pain you went through I went through it too."

"Well, why did you leave me? Why Edward, why, why?" I was sobbing in hysterics.

"I don't know, I am so stupid. I can't believe I caused you so much pain."

He came to me and wrapped his arms around me. And instead of pushing him away, I hugged him and cried, and cried, and cried some more. And then I realized what I was doing, I shoved him away.

"Edward, you need to leave now." I said in a soft voice instead of a mean hard voice.

"Do you still love me?"

"I can't answer that, you know I do and will, but not the same anymore." I saw the pain wash over his face. He turned, but I stopped him.

"Edward wait!"

"Yes?" He was frowning.

I ran to him before the door was opened.

"I love you, I'm in love with you! I am sorry I am so mean."

"Its okay, your just giving me what I deserve."

I let go of him and he started to walk away and I couldn't bear to see it.

"Turn around now." He did as told.

I grabbed him by his shirt and sat him down on the chair. I wrapped my legs around him, and kissed him. He kissed back. I didn't want him to stop. I wasn't even thinking about Jake. I wouldn't let him leave my lips, I know I needed air but I didn't want to part from his lips. We kissed for about ten minutes. Then I heard the door open and a gasp. I knew that gasp from anywhere. It was Jake.

I jumped off Edward and ran into the bathroom. I couldn't deal with this, I felt so bad, and I can't believe I am hurting him like this. What was wrong with me. I am so stupid. I didn't hear any yelling, but I didn't want to leave this bathroom and face them. Jake is going to be so mad.

I finally got the courage to come out, the only one there was Edward, and he had a smile. Not an arrogant smile but a happy one.

"Where is he?"

"He left."


	5. Letter to Readers : Concerning CH 4!

_**Dear all my readers, **_

_**Some people have told me that chapter 4 makes no since, I was meaning for it to be like, Bella was upset at first because her life was fine until he had come back into it. And when Edward was giving up and leaving, it brought the pain of him leaving all over again and she couldn't bear it because she DOES love him, and wants to be with him, but she DOES have Jake.. And that after when Jake didn't say anything, he was shocked, he couldn't breathe, he was in pain. Just like Bella at first she was in pain, couldn't move. And as for Bella swearing, her bad vocabulary is only in shocked or very angry situation, she doesn't swear regularly, and she is an adult, and ADULTS SO swear. … Thank you to everyone who has read this. Chapter 5 is going to be in Jacob's POV, and it might be very short, I am working on it. It is going to be a while to post, I have school and such. So, thank you! Keep reading, if you need anything clarified, message me. I do appreciate harsh criticism and good, so please tell me. **_

_**And thank you to Cherish for bringing up what she did. I do realize what you mean and hopefully, you do get some clarification on what is meant and done. **_

_**Thank you everyone!!! **_

_**Beth AKA twi-fi-90239 **_


	6. Chapter 5: Confused

I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT IT ALL GOES TO STEPHANIE MEYER!!!!

_**SOME OF THIS CHAPTER IS IN BELLA'S AND JAKE'S pov SO PLEASE DO NOT GET CONFUSED! You will see BPOV for Bella and JPOV for Jake!**_

_**Thanks again to MANDI … the description is like you. I think I got pretty close. Lol! Love you like a sister! Your dream come true JAKE! TL CUSTODY!!! **_

_**JPOV!**_

Me and Colby where on our way back to our girls. We saw Jenny but no Bella.

"Hey Jenny, where is Bella?"

"In the bathroom, she's been in there for like 15 minutes."

"I think I am going to go and check on her."

"Okay, oh hey Jake, some pixie like girl was looking for her too. She might have met up with her. But go make sure she is okay, and Mandi will be here in like five minutes."

"Kay."

I was hoping that she was okay; maybe the bloodsuckers had taken her. But I knew they wouldn't. I was rounding the corner to the kitchen, and I thought I heard a noise in there, a giggle almost. So I opened the door I thought about knocking, but I figured I was just thinking something. There I saw Edward and Bella kissing. I felt my heart break into a million pieces; I couldn't believe she would do this to me. She had gotten up and ran into the bathroom. Neither I nor Edward had said a word. I was frozen in place. Finally I was able to move, I didn't feel like talking to anyone, because I might get so I angry I would phase. I was going to go straight home and sleep on the couch, maybe Bella would stay away for the night and let me think.

As I walked out of the kitchen, I saw a girl standing right next to Jenny. She was beautiful. Black hair, brown eyes, and just beautiful. I don't know what it was, I was all upset with Bella, then suddenly … I was okay; it was like this girl was the missing piece of my life. I have to know who she is.

I knew Bella would probably come looking for me in a few minutes. I smiled to Jenny and this mystery girl, and then I left the party.

_**BPOV!**_

I walked out of the room, and Edward was trailing behind me. I walked up to Jenny.

"Hey Jen, have you seen Jake?"

"Yea, and he sure looked pissed off, but I guess now I know why. Hi, what's your name?" She asked Edward with a lusty smile on her face.

Edward just laughed a little chuckle.

"Okay, we have to go."

"Uhmmm Bella, you might not want to go to the house, he looked pretty pissed. You can stay with me if you wanna, you'll have to sleep on the couch though. My sister Mandi is here. Want to meet her?"

"Sure but only to say hi."

"Kay, and wait, Jake had given her like, not mean, but an interesting look, I don't know how to describe it."

"Okay. Where is she?" I was rushing because I wanted to leave.

"Hold on."

While Jenny went to go and get Mandi, I asked Edward what Jenny was thinking.

"She was thinking about how much she wants to get with me, and she was thinking about how big you scored. Her words not mine!" He chuckled.

"I feel bad for Jake, I am such an idiot."

"No, if you could have read his mind, he was mad at first, and then well, he has to figure it out before I tell you."

"Are you going to stay at Jenny's house?"

"Yes, I guess I kinda have too. Huh."

"No, you can stay with me."

"What about your family."

"You mean OUR family."

"What?"

"They still think of you as family, well except for Rose."

"Sure I guess."

When I and Edward finished talking, Jenny and her sister Mandi came. She was pretty, but why would Jake give her a weird look.

"Bella, this is Mandi."

"Hi!"

"Hi, how are you."

"Okay, but I kinda have to go, I am sorry, maybe we can hangout tomorrow."

"Sure. Well have a nice night."

"Thanks, Oh and Jenny, I am going to stay at a motel. I will call you later. I am going to go out of town so Jake can have some room. See you in the morning."

"Okay, bye."

It felt bad to lie, but I had to. I couldn't have Jake and Edward in the same room, for all I know Jake would phase and try to kill Edward and vice versa.

I can't believe my actions. I had just ruined the second most important thing in my life. How in the world could I have done this? And what did Edward mean when he said that 'he was mad at first, and then well, he has to figure it out before I tell you.'? I keep asking myself why I had jumped on him when I had wanted him gone moments before. I came to the conclusion that it was because my pain was rushing back when he had given up. But I still do not know what I am going to do. Should I choose Jake or Edward, either way I will die inside?

_**JPOV!**_

I had gotten home a little while after the party. I wasn't in pain anymore. Ever since I saw that girl, I was okay, I don't get it.

I looked out of the window around 2 o'clock in the morning and saw that girl, Jenny, and Colby walking to their apartment. I don't know who this girl is I think it is Jenny's sister. I guess I will see tomorrow in the morning.

I fell asleep a little while after that and I had a dream, well more like a memory. When I was telling Bella about imprinting. Then I had woken up and I knew what had happened. I decided to call Sam to make sure I was right.

"Hey Sam?"

"What is it Jake, I was trying to sleep."

"Right sorry time changes. Sorry."

"Okay I am up, what do you want?"

"You know imprinting? I think I did."

"WHAT, with whom? Was it Bella?"

"I don't exactly know who she is; I think she is my neighbor's sister, and no sadly not with Bella."

"Well, was it like a shock, or do you just think she is pretty?"

"It was like all my problems went away when I had seen her. God and I think Bella is okay, she found Edward, and I caught them kissing, but I guess I am fine now, I was pissed, but then I saw her."

"Okay, that's great, WAIT the bloodsuckers are back? And Bella chose him over you, again?"

"Yea. I am okay now. No hurt feelings. Now my mission is to figure out who this is. So I guess I will let you sleep and I am just going to wait a few more hours and go see her."

"Whatever. Bye Jake."

"Bye."

Now I have to go and knock on Jenny's door and see this girl. Well in at least 3 hours. Seeing as it is 6:30. I guess I will try and go back to sleep.

_**BPOV!**_

When me and Edward had left and gone back to his house. We stopped by to see Jake. He was passed out on the couch. I asked Edward to stop in and grab some of my clothes. He knows what I wear. So I was hoping he would grab some of my normal clothing. But he didn't. Instead he grabbed my short tight shorts, used when I was trying to work out, and a blue (of course) camisole. And for my clothes for tomorrow, my blue tight blouse and my torn blue skinny jeans. Great. Just what I wanted to wear!

"Really Edward, I don't think that I should stay at your house, I think Jake will be mad and I can't take that, I do love him regardless of how much I love you."

"Isabella, I already told you he is not mad at you, he was but then- wait I can't tell you, and he has to. Tomorrow. Now we have to get you to my house and into bed."

"Fine, but wait, I want to try one thing first. Close your eyes, and don't move."

"Okay." And he did so.

As he did that, I kissed him, he didn't move, nothing, it was only a short kiss; I didn't want to piss two people off tonight.

"Okay, you may open your eyes." And so he did.

"Wow, I can't believe how much I missed that."

"Yea, me neither. Now let's go."

We got to his house and everyone was in there own places, Esme reading, Carlisle was also reading, Emmet and Jasper were goofing off, and Rosalie and Alice were on the computer ordering clothes. Well they were until I called out "HELLO, IS ANYONE HOME?" When I did that everyone came rushing, well at the speed of light into the living room, white on white. I was pumbled my Esme, which she didn't usually do.

"Oh my, Bella, how I have missed my daughter, please stay, I missed you."

"I missed you too Esme." She had then released me and Jasper out of everyone hugged me.

"Uhm, hi Jasper."

"Oh Bella I missed my sister, and don't worry I am well feed." He had said with a laugh.

Then came Carlisle. "Hi my sweet child, I missed you, how are you my dear?"

"Fine and I missed you too.

Emmet was next. He grabbed me in a bear hug. "There's my little sis."

"EMMET! I CAN'T BREATH!!!"

"Sorry."

Rosalie just smiled no hug from her. Alice then gave me a tight hug and said that she loved me and I said that I loved her too.

Edward then coughed. "Everyone Bella will be staying here tonight, I will inform you on what happened later. But for now everyone go back to what you were doing."

And everyone did so.

He brought me up stairs and got me settled on his couch.

He laid me down and he cradled me like he did when he was with me. I fell straight to sleep and I had no night mares.

_**JPOV**_

I woke up again around 10:00, so now I think it is time to go and see who that girl is.

I had knocked on the door and the girl had answered.

"Hi" She said in a chipper voice.

"Hello." I responded in a quiet voice.

"May I ask you a question; it may sound kinda rude but oh well."

"Sure."

"Why were you staring at me yesterday?"

"Oh that, haha, that is kind of a hard question to answer."

"Well tell me! And please tell me who you are."

"Okay, my name is Jake, and I live next door.

"You're avoiding the other question, it's not like you are a werewolf, you imprinted on, and you want to live with me forever."

"Uhm, yea."

"Oh I know that that is what happened! Don't try to deny it!"

"HOW IN THE HELL DO YOU KNOW THAT!"

"Uhm, I am a witch see!" And she showed me, she moved boulders above herself, and she had the car above her head as well. She was using levitation and telekinesis.

"OH MY GOD! WHAT IN THE HELL! HOW CAN YOU DO THAT, THE ISN'T NORMAL!"

"I know, I am a witch and I can sense what other people are as well, so that is how I know what you are."

"OKAY, but how did you know that I imprinted?"

"Because one of my dearest friends is a werewolf and he imprinted on a girl and I saw him do it, so I know what it looks like."

"Alrighty, but why did you tell me you know?"

"Because I know that if I didn't then this whole staring at me thing will go back and forth for a while, and I don't think I can take it."

"Okay and where do we go from here? We barely know each other."

"Jake, I know we don't know each other and I am kind of attractive to you so we should go out a few times and get to know each other."

"Well, I am kind of in a relationship, well not so much anymore."

"I know, she was with some vampire guy and they looked pretty happy, so I think you're golden!"

"How did you- oh never mind 'sensing what people are thing'."

"Well, tell her, I don't think she will be in to much pain. Good luck see you later."

"Bye."

"Bye Jake!"

She closed the door and I was still in shock. I still don't understand why she would tell me; even if she knew what I am it still is a little weird. But quite frankly I don't care. I now know that she wants to get to know me so we can be together. Now the only thing I need to do is talk to Bella. But for some reason I still love her, and even though she is with _him_ I don't want to hurt her.

_**BPOV**_

I woke up in Edward's arms. It felt so strange, after so many years, me and him back together again. I looked up and he smiled my favorite crooked smile. He dazzled me, again! What am I going to do, I can't just leave Jake, but I think I need to be with Edward to be happy. After a minute or two my stomach growled and Edward said "Time for the human to eat breakfast" I laughed and we ran down to the kitchen. They had food, props of course! He fixed me some eggs. Alice came down stairs with Jasper. They had both given me hugs, and said that they were happy I was here. After a while I told Edward I think that I should go and talk to Jake. I got dressed and then Edward tried to distract me by kissing me and it worked, for a minute. Then I told him I had to go, so he rode me over there, on his back, and kissed me and told me he will be in the woods to make sure I am okay.

I walked in and Jake was in the kitchen.

"Hi" I said in a somber voice.

"Hey Bells." He responded in a cheery voice. I figured he would be mad.

"I'm so sorry I can't believe I broke your heart, I am so so sorry!" I started to ramble off apologies, but he stopped me.

"Bells, its okay. Let me explain a few things."

_**AUOTHOR'S NOTE:**_

_**Once again I would like to tell everyone how thankful I am for all the reader's and I would like to say that I also like reviews. Hopefully this clarified things from chapter four, and Mandi (Jenny's Sister) told Jake all those things because of all the reasoning's told in the chapter, It may seem as though it was a little too fast but hopefully that isn't too much of a problem. Thank you!**_


	7. Chapter 6: Kisses

I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT IT ALL GOES TO STEPHANIE MEYER!!!!

BPOV:

"What do you mean it is okay, I hurt you, I am so sorry." I was about in tears when Jake laughed. "What is so funny?"

"Okay Bells, why don't we sit down?" So we sat, and Jake started to talk.

"Uhm, how do I start this? Okay here we go. "You love Edward right?" I agreed. "You love me right?"

"Of course."

"Okay, well I know that you love me in a different way than Edward, I know that you were never actually in love with me and felt that way about me. So, I just want to tell you I love you and I found my Edward. Not in that type of way though." We both laughed.

"Wait, what do you mean?" I asked.

"You remember me explaining imprinting to you? Well I kinda did."

"With who?"

"Jenny's sister Mandi."

"Okay. And how did you tell her about this?"

"Funny story. She knew."

"Wh-what?"

"Uhm, she is a which, I know hard to believe, but she is, she has powers."

"What can she do? Is she good or bad?"

"She can levitate and she is telekinetic. And she is good, not to harmful." He chuckled. "Oh, and she can sense what people are, werewolf, vampire, etcetera."

"Uhm, uhhh, I am kinda speechless." And I really was. Who would of though a werewolf, which, and a house full of vampires on one street.

"So she knew that you imprinted?"

"Yes for more than that one reason, she had seen her best friend imprint."

"Jake?"

"Yea?" He came and gave me a big hug.

"Are you still mad at me for choosing Edward, again?"

"Surprisingly, no, now that I have her. I was mad when I first found out, but then I saw … her."

"Jake, you know that I would never want to hurt you right?"

"Of course, and I just want to let you know that I want you to be happy, aren't you happy I imprinted? Cause other wise I would probably be killing some bloodsuckers."

I laughed, I was happy now, Jake and I would both be happy.

"You're going to be my best man right?"

"Of course, and you'll be my best girl, right?"

"Of course."

"Can Edward come in?"

"I guess." He said in an angry voice.

"Are you sure, be careful."

"Yes Bella let him in."

"Edward you may come in." And as I said those words the door opened and he was standing there, my perfect angel.

"Hello Jacob."

"Edward."

Jake started off.

"Okay, Edward, I know that you love her, but you weren't there when she needed you. You left, I was there, I will never give you my blessing, and I know that that will kill you Bella and I am sorry." He looked to me. "But you have to know where I am coming from. I will always love Bella regardless that I have imprinted, but I will still always love her."

"I understand that Jacob, but you have to understand, I didn't want to leave her, she was my life and when I left, I died, and I was literally dead inside, no pun intended. And I am sorry to both of you and I want you to understand that I do love her and no matter what I will never leave her again. I also understand you never giving us your blessing, I really do, but I want to thank you for keeping her alive." He choked on that last word. " I am really happy for you, I am glad that now everyone has someone to love and to be with forever."

"Okay guys, I think we have had enough with all of this. So Jake and I have some things to sort out, house and such. So Edward I will see you later."

"Love you." "Love you too."

After Edward left with a quiet good-bye to Jake. Jake and I talked. We came to the conclusion that we wouldn't tell Charlie and Billy about this until we have to go for a visit. And that we will both live in the apartment, he will get the spare bedroom with Mandi if she stays, and I will get the master bedroom for Edward and me whenever he comes.

I, Jake, and Mandi all met. She seemed sweet, and I told her I have hurt him enough and that if she hurts him, she will be hurt, although that seems utterly impossible.

After Jake and Mandi left, I went over to call Edward, but before the phone got through the first ring he was there. And he was kissing me, very passionately, it hurt inside knowing that I couldn't go farther. But I took advantage of what I had. And surprisingly he let me go farther that usual. I got to un-button his shirt to see his beautiful body. When I became to out of breath he moved down to my collar-bone. When I caught my breath, he went back up to my mouth. This lasted about two minutes until he gently parted my lips and let his tongue into my mouth. After a while, he pushed me away gently, and he looked pained.

"What's the matter?" I questioned.

"I just wish I could have more." He had told me, and he looked as if he would cry if it were possible.

"Well that makes two of us." I added with a pained chuckle.

"I guess the only way to do that is to marry me first."

"What?" I was completely startled.

"I know I have only been back in your life for a little bit of time, but I would like for you to marry me, so that we are never be parted again. Hold on one minute okay?"

"Uhm… yeah."

He ran off, it gave me about a minute to put the pieces together. He just freaking proposed to me and all I can say is 'what' how stupid can one person be?"

He then ran back into the room, he made me stand up and then he knelt down to the ground, "Isabella Marie Swan, I would be honored to call you my wife and to love with you forever and ever, will you please do me the honor and marry me?"

"Uhm, of course Edward I will!" And at those words, he slipped the most beautiful ring on my finger, I was dazzled.

"This was my mothers." He explained.

"I love it Edward." And in those words he picked me up and kissed me and spun me around.

Alice and the family walked through the door.

"Alice had a vision." Esme stated. "I can't believe this; Alice and I have so much work to do."

"Ah, Esme, I don't mean to sound rude, but I would really like to do this."

"We'll see." She said and gave me a hug and kiss and left.

"Well I see you guys have some talking to do." And with that said everyone gave us hugs and left, all apart from one person, Rosalie.

"Edward, how do we tell my family, I know we have to wait until we visit to break the news to them, but how do I tell them that we are engaged?"

"Love, don't even worry right now okay? You need to get rest tonight, we have the first day of school tomorrow."

"Well I need rest, you need to eat."

"I have evening classes, you have day, and I can eat later."

"Well then don't leave me tonight."

"That is okay with me."

"I have to go and take a shower, can you wait five minutes?"

"Hardly, but I think I can manage in your room with your scent around me."

"Love you." "Love you to." Edward picked me up and kissed me very softly.

"I'll be right out."

I let the shower run over my body; my thoughts were racing through my head. Edward and I together again. I stood there under the warm water and all of a sudden the water got boiling. I let out a shriek, a cry for help. I jumped out of the shower and I was on the verge of tears. Edward came bursting in; I knew right then I had scared him.

"Bella! Are you okay? What happened?"

"Yeah, I'm okay. The water was fine then all of a sudden it got boiling hot, I don't know what happened. I will be okay; I don't know how it got so hot."

"Okay, are you sure you are fine, that scream almost broke glass."

"Yes Edward I am okay."

Edward started to stare at me and it occurred to me I was still naked from my shower. I wonder if this would change his mind about no sex until we are married.

"Uhm Edward?"

"So-sorry."

"Its okay, is that a good or a bad stare?"

"Defiantly a good stare."

"Would you like to join me for the rest of my shower?"

"No Bella, you know what that will lead to, I have a very small self control seeing you like this."

"I know, but I haven't seen you for years."

"Exactly, and we have only been with each other for a couple of days, it isn't right. And I wouldn't be your first, and I understand why but I whish I could have."

"Wait, you think that I have already?"

"Well yes, you've been with Jake for a while, and I just though."

"Well, you thought wrong, I almost did to get you out of my mind, but I never have. I always wanted you to be my first."

"Well, I guess I am done, I think I will go to bed."

We walked in the room and I took off the towel that wasn't of much use seeing as I was pretty much dried standing talking to Edward, and started to change. He was staring at me when I turned around. "Edward can you please stop staring at me it is very weird."

"Sorry, it is just so hard not to, you are just so beautiful."

"Your one to talk, and if I am so beautiful why won't you let me go any further than kissing?"

"Well, because I can break you into pieces, and I can't do that."

"Edward, can't we at least try?"

"No, not now, wait until we are married. I am not going to have this discussion tonight. It is time for you to go to bed; you have to get up early."

"Fine. But we will see if you change your mind." I had spoken to him in a devilish way."

"Goodnight Bella, I will see you in the morning."

"Goodnight."

He held me in his arms and hummed my lullaby that I haven't hears in many, many years. I still remembered it all to well. I had almost drifted asleep and the thought occurred to me, I had never asked Edward how all my stuff ended up in the box I opened.

"Edward," I said with sleepiness in my voice."

"Hmm?"

"That box, how did my things end up in there?"

"I placed them in there before I left; I hid it so that you wouldn't find it."

"But, why."

"I didn't think it was fair to take it away from you, but I didn't want you to have to have it screaming in your face."

"Okay…" I was too tired to fight with him about it."

"I love you." He whispered in my ears.

"You too."

I fell asleep in his arms, and I woke with a wonderful dream. Edward, standing at the end of the aisle, with a beautiful tux on, he looked perfect. I was wearing a wonderful gown, I surprisingly looked amazingly gorgeous. My dad at my side. And Jake was there too, wearing a tux as well, the whole family was there. Edward's and mine, my mother and Phil, and Charlie was there too. I had tears in my eyes; Edward misunderstood and thought they were because I was sad. I told him about my dreams, and I could see that he would have cried if it were possible.

He told me that, that dream would soon be reality very soon. I couldn't wait until the day I could call Edward mine, Mrs. Edward Cullen. I was so ecstatic.

I got up and got ready for school. I wish Edward and I both had day classes. His didn't start for another week because his were at night.

Before I had the chance to leave, Edward picked me up and told me I had another half an hour. He said instead of driving witch would take about 10 minutes and then having to find a parking place, he would just run me over there. Literally. With that in mind he put me down on my feet. Cupped my chin, tilted my face up, looked me in the eyes, and then slowly kissed me. After a little while, I had forgotten to wake up Jake. I stopped Edward and he was confused, I told him I needed to wake up Jake.

"JAKE! You need to wake up." I yelled through the door. There was no answer.

I opened the door. I probably should have knocked first; I was used to seeing Jake, not completely dressed. But then I saw Mandi laying there with just the bed sheet around her. A bit of Jealousy spread through me, I didn't understand why but hey, you can't not be jealous when the guy you were with for five years. Then all of a sudden Mandi stood up. Fully clothed.

"You can't think I would sleep with him on the first night now would you?" She asked.

"Uhm, I don't know." We both laughed.

"So where is Jake?"

"In the bathroom. He will be out in a few minutes."

"Are you going to school here?"

"No, no college for me!"

"Oh, okay. Will he be out soon?"

"Yea, he's going to leave when he gets out. What about you?"

"No Edward is going to bring me."

"I knew I smelled a vampire in here. Can I meet him?"

"Yea, Edward."

After I got them aquatinted. Edward and I went back into our room. We still had about ten minutes until Edward was going to bring me to school. He finished kissing me, slowly he had put me on the dresser so he didn't have to bend and I didn't have to reach. Soon after he pushed me away and laughed.

"What do you think is so funny?"

"Nothing, just that I wish you didn't have to go to school so that I could kiss you all day."

I looked into his eyes they were getting darker.

"Well, we do have all night, so why don't you go hunt and when I come home greet me at the door with a kiss!" I smirked.  
"I guess. Then maybe I wouldn't have to stop every few minutes." He winked.

"Ha, now I think I have to go."

"Okay hold on a sec okay?"

He didn't even give me the chance to answer; he grabbed me in a rough kiss. I grabbed a fistful of hair, and I felt very dizzy, but I didn't want him to stop, I wish I could kiss him forever. Then he did something he never really does. He grabbed a fistful of my hair and pulled my head back and kissed my neck. I really wish that we could go farther. He must have read my mind, even though I know that he can't and he stopped.

"No, please, kiss me!"

"I can't we have to go and we can finish when you get home."

"Fine. Now if you don't want to kiss me then bring me to school."

He put me on his back and we were off to school. He stopped right by the school and kissed me before he put me down and let me go. "Love you." "And I love you too my sweet Bella." And I was off.

The day drug on and on, it was somewhat like high school. Registration, getting books and getting used to people and the teachers. I kept looking at the clock; this day couldn't be going slower. I met up with Jenny, Colby, and Jake. We all ate lunch in the dining hall. We talked about meaningless things but I couldn't focus I just wanted to be in Edwards arms. Jake had said that he and Mandi were going on a date tonight for dinner. Jake was going to explain it to them but they already knew. Jenny told us that she was a normal person and that only her sister and brother got the witch gene. She said that she was glad. When lunch was over we all departed to our classes and only half of the day left.

Finally the day was over and I was able to get home. My truck was in the parking lot, which Jake drove here. We both hopped in and we started to talk about our classes and such. I finally parked in my drive way, Jake was going over to Mandi's.

I opened up the door and before I could look up I was in the arms of Edward and was being kissed ferociously. After a minute or two he set me down.

"How was that for a welcome home kiss?"

"Wonderful, now I have no homework so where are we going to kiss all night."

"Wherever you want."

"How about we shut the door, start in the living room and then end up in my room before I have to shower and go to bed."

"Fine with me."

Before I could reply he was kissing me. He set me on the couch without missing a beat. He sat me on top of him. He did what he did this morning and grabbed a fistful of my hair. Then he moved to my neck, I asked him to stop for two minutes. And he did.

"What is up with the kisses the way they are?"

"Because I want you and this is as far as we can go so I want to give you the best I can. Do you not like it?"

"No, I love it actually." Then I got caught with a kiss, apparently the two minutes were up. He then picked me up and put me on the kitchen counter. He kissed me like that for a few minutes. We made our way through every room except from Jake's. We landed in our room and we were on our bed. I knew nothing was going to happen, but I wished. Soon after being in our room, my stomach growled. Edward was stopped and brought me out to the kitchen to grab something to eat. I didn't realize but it was already 7:30 at night. I ate and took a shower, Edward then wrapped me in my towel and we kissed until I had to change. We kissed some more, and then he said time for bed.

"Uhm, Edward."

"Yes?"

"I didn't actually think you would kiss me all night."

"Well, you asked, and we didn't do anything else, so I think that everything is okay. I mean I wanted to loose my self control many timed today, but I didn't, I did it for you. Are you satisfied?"

"If that is all I get, then yes, but if I could have gone further, then no."

"Okay then, but you need to get rest. I'm going to get you Chap Stick your lips are going to be dry in the morning."

"At least wait until I am asleep to go."

"Of course, I love you, goodnight."

"Good night Edward."

He hummed my lullaby until I was asleep. I drifted off into the same pleasant dream I had the night before. I was happy. Everyone was happy.


	8. Chapter 7: Almost But Not Yet

I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT IT ALL GOES TO STEPHANIE MEYER!!!!

**BPOV:**

I woke up in the morning. Edward was tracing circles on my face. I opened my eyes and saw his beautiful crooked smile. I smiled too. I looked deeply into his eyes and saw just how much he loved me. It sounds silly saying that, but I saw the adoration, I saw how much he has had to suffer because of me. A tear started to form at the corner of my eyes, and Edward stopped and he kissed my tear before it could fall. His eyes went from delighted to sad in the matter of seconds.

"What's the matter baby?" He asked me with the most caring of voices.

"I just was thinking of how much you have to suffer because of me. You have to try and not to kill me every second we are together. I am so sorry."

"Do not ever say you are sorry. I love you so much. And the pain isn't a minuscule portion than the pain of not being with you."

"Oh, Edward, I love you so much." And with those words I hugged him as hard as I could and repeated how much I loved him. Over and Over again.

"Bella. I love you too. So much, words can not describe it. Now please baby stop crying."

"I'm sorry." And I started to laugh

"That a girl." He kissed me. So sweet and tenderly. I kissed back and he stopped and looked at me. Now he looked as if he were to cry.

"What's the matter?"

"Nothing, absolutely nothing. I just love you so much and want to spend my life with you, forever and ever."

"We will. Forever and ever. Because you are going to change me. Soon."

"There is no compromising with you and the best I can say is after graduation."

"But Edward-"

"Don't but me missy. That is it. Then or never." He smiled. He won. But this wouldn't be the last time we talked about it. I want to change, and now. And it will happen. He saw I was thinking about something and he asked me, I replied with a pure 'nothing'.

I had to get up and get dressed for school. I went into the bathroom and went to go and brush my tooth that's when I saw my lips. Chapped beyond no repair. I saw the Chap Stick that Edward bought me. I put it on immediately. I went out in the kitchen and Edward had my breakfast ready for me. We sat across from each other and I looked up and every time he would be looking at me in admiration. It would make me blush every time. How much I love him. Sometimes it hurt. But as long as he is with me, I will be okay. Jake came out of his room dressed and ready to go. He looked at Edward with pure hate. I was astonished; I thought they were on good terms now. I wonder what happened. Jake left the house and I asked Edward what happened.

"Jake may be saying that it is alright that we are together now that he has Mandi. But He still hates that you left him for me. It sounds contradicting but I understand where he is coming from. But he isn't half as mad as he would have been if he didn't have Mandi. He plans on lying and saying it is okay. But we know that it is not. But he will get over it."

"Wow." That was all I could say. "I wish he would tell me himself that he is still upset."

"I know sweetheart. But he is a stubborn person and wants you to be happy. You of all should know that."

"I do know that, but I still wish that he would tell me."

"I know. But let's get you to school."

"Alright. Wait when are you going to be going to school?"

"Uhm, I am not going to be going to school this semester. I want to be with you. We have five years to make up."

"Edward. Wow. I love you; you give up so much for me. I am so sorry."

"Don't be I want to do this. Now we have to go."

He got me to school right on time. I saw Jake and I ran up to him. He looked at me and smiled. He said sorry about the look this morning but he didn't get enough sleep. I knew he would lie to me. I made my way to my class. There was one seat open, right next to this guy who's name I soon learned was Ranger. He kept looking at me like he wanted to take me home. Edward would not like that. At the end of the day, Ranger stopped me on my way to the meeting spot me and Edward has. Hidden under a bunch of trees. He asked me if I wanted to study with him. I denied the invitation I knew exactly what he meant. He left and I walked into the trees. Edward looked pissed.

"What's the matter?"

"That guy, he had very bad thoughts in his mind. He wanted to get you in bed. I want to kill him."

"No Edward, No! I hate that he was thinking that but you will NOT harm him in any way shape or form. Not unless he does something to me."

"Fine. But as soon as he says or does something that he shouldn't, I am going to hurt him."

There was no fighting with him. He put me on his back and we were on our way. We got home and I saw a sticky note on the fridge it said, "_Charlie called. From Jake."_ With that, I called Charlie.

He answered on the third ring.

"Hey Bells, How are you?"

"Hey dad, I'm fine. Just got home from school, how are you doing?"

"Uhm, I'm okay. Well Bells, I'm not okay. I went to the doctors today and he said that I had a slight case of pneumonia. But it's not bad, I will be fine, I promise Bella."

"What! How did you get pneumonia?"

"Bella. You lived in this town, you tell me."

"Oh. Okay. Just take care of yourself dad. Please. I can't have you dyeing on me."

"Bella I will be fine. But I have to go back to work."

"Okay. I love you. Be safe.

"Always am. I love you too. Good-bye."

"Bye."

That was a three minute conversation that I wish I didn't want to have. Edward saw the distress in my face. He came over and he kissed my forehead. And then started to massage me shoulders and then my temples. He did that for about fifteen minutes. We sat in complete silence. He didn't ask me if I was okay, because he knew I wasn't. He knew that I worried about Charlie. And even if it is a slight case, I am still worried. I just hope that he will take care of himself. Edward broke the silence.

"Jake will be here in about five minutes."

"Okay. And you were right. He tried and act like everything was fine."

"Don't worry about it. He had Mandi he will learn to live. The jealousy will pass, even if you don't believe it, it will I promise."

I guess the five minutes has passed as me and Edward talked incessantly about nothing upon nothing. Just about classes and such. It didn't have much interest for me, but he was intrigued. I guess it was just because he loved me that much. As I loved him. When Jake walked in Mandi was on his arm. He said hello to both of us and Edwards face turned to a grin when Jake walked into his room and shut the door.

"And why are you smiling mister. Are they going to do anything? Should we leave and give them privacy?"

"No they are not going to be doing anything, don't worry. And his thoughts are what made me smile. His words in his thoughts were… "Stupid bloodsucker had to take Bella, at least now I have this beautiful amazing wonderful woman." It made me smile because his thoughts are so pure towards her and he loves her already. And her thoughts are the same. She loves him too. I find it a cute puppy love. Legitimately." We both laughed a bit.

Edward started to say something, I couldn't make it out. But then he said it, only this time louder. "I wish that we didn't have to be in the same house. The smell is killing me. Wet dog smell."

"I'm sorry Edward."

"I will survive I guess."

"Okay. I love you." "As I love you my sweet Isabella Swan."

I saw his glance at the ring and in my head I thought, 'I will be his but not Isabella Swan, but Isabella Cullen. How I loved the sound of that. I couldn't help but smile and I guess he kind of figured it was because I was happy we were going to be getting married. And it was. He asked me when I wanted to be married. I didn't give him a date, I just said "A.S.A.P!" He smiled with _my_ crooked grin. We were interrupted by the radio coming on in the living room.

"What was that?"

"Mandi did it." Edward said. It was kind of hard to believe but she came out.

"Did I scare you?" With a giddy smile.

"Yes. I said with disbelief.

"Sorry, Jake said it would but I didn't believe him, but I guess he was right. Funny right?"

"Sure. Yes very funny." My voice had slight sarcasm to it and she noticed because her expression changed from a real smile to a fake one in a matter of seconds.

They went back into Jake's room. And the water turned on and a glass was in mid-air and was then filled with water and floating to Jake's room. The door opened and closed. I guess Mandi was thirsty. That was pretty cool that she could do that.

Edward and I talked about random things; we were sitting in the living room. Mandi and Jake came out. Mandi said goodnight to Edward and I. They walked out of the door and kissed goodnight and Mandi was gone.

"Do you think you could cool it on the sarcasm Bella?"

"Sorry Jake."

"It's okay. This time. Well I am going to go for a run and try and talk to my boys."

"Okay. If I don't see you tonight. I will see you tomorrow."

"Okay goodnight."

"Night."

Edward and I went off into my room, kissed and talked. I took my shower. And he lulled me to sleep with my lullaby. The same routine of today happened for about a week. And then something strange started to happen. Edward was leaving everyday for about an hour. He wasn't feeding because his eyes were always the same color. His eyes never showed anything wrong. And I could always tell no matter what. I got fed-up with this after about two weeks. I confronted him and told him not to lie. He assured me everything was wonderful. I asked him why he wouldn't tell me. He told me it was a surprise for after we get married. And then one more day of him leaving for an hour. When he came home he looked happy. He wouldn't tell me what it was he was doing but he told me to wait and I would love it. After that night he didn't leave me and we started in the same pattern as before. I felt like an old married couple.

"Edward I feel like we are an old married couple. We do the same thing every day. Can we go and see the family?"

"Bella. I was waiting for you to ask. You are right same pattern everyday does get boring. Well at least for a human." He grinned at me.

"Not for much longer." I winked. And his smile was gone. I shouldn't have done that. It made him upset. He kissed me on the forehead and said he loved me. We then left to go and see everyone.

We got to the house and walked in. Everyone greeted up. Alice gave me a bone crushing hug and so did Emmett. I got hugs and a kiss on the cheek from everyone but Rosalie-shocker. Everyone went there separate ways except for Alice who grabbed me away from Edwards side. He growled but she told him to get over it. We went up to her room. We sat in her closet, which was bigger than her room. She pulled out a bunch of clothes and had make-up laid out and she also had a bunch of shoes.

"Alice. What are you doing?"

"Playing dress up with my sister."

"Rosalie isn't in here.  
"I know. Not her, you."

"I was hoping that it wasn't me. I don't want to play you life sized doll Alice."

"I know. But you are going to, I've seen it."

"Come on Alice. Really? You are going to do this to me?"

"Yes. Now shut up and get over it."

She sat me down on a chair and put a blind fold over my eyes. She then made me stand up. She undressed me and slipped on a shirt witch felt like silk. She then put on a skirt. I was scared to see what she was doing. She didn't put on shoes…yet.

"Now Bella. If you try and look at your outfit I will be very upset. So please do not open your eyes." She giggled with her chime like laugh.

"Fine." I grumbled to her.

She pulled to blindfold off and sat me in a chair and spun me around. I kept my eyes closed. I'm not even sure if I want to see what she has put me in. I felt brushes touching my eye lids and pencils and every type of make-up applicators. She put something on my lips. Probably lip stick. And then she turned me around again and pulled my hair up. She then put shoes on. "Be careful when you stand up please." She said to me. She pulled me up. And apart from her saying be careful. I almost fell. "Bella, Bella, Bella. You need to learn how to be graceful."

"Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, I know."

"Okay now turn around on the count of three. One, Two, THREE!" I turned around but didn't open my eyes. "God damn it Bella, open your eyes. Your making me upset. So to make her feel better I opened my eyes. I couldn't believe the woman in the mirror was me.

I was wearing a gorgeous tight blue shirt. I was right it was silk. And a black mini skirt. The black stilettos she put on me made my legs become longer. They had black ribbons that wrapped up half way to my knee and it was tied into a bow on the back of my leg.

My make-up looked beautiful. I had a light brown eye shadow that ended with black on the side of my eyelid. I had a little bit of blush. And light red lipstick on.

"WOW!"

"I know. You look amazing. Edward is going to have some fun with you missy." She laughed and smiled at me. "So do you like it?"

"I never thought I would say this seeing as I am wearing heals, but I absolutely love it! Alice, thank you so much!" I grabbed her into a hug as tight as I could. She laughed.

"I think Edward is becoming impatient he doesn't know what I am doing to you. I have thought about other things around him and while I was doing everything."

"Yes. I want to see Edward's reaction."

"Edward, you may enter."

He came in and saw me standing there. He stopped mid stride and just stared. I blushed. My face must have been as red as a cherry.

"Alice, what are you trying to do to me? I really can't keep my mind pure right now."

"Well then don't Edward." I said with a smile. I think I am going to get what I want. Alice left and it was just me and Edward there. He couldn't stop looking at me. I was self conscious but I had to play along I could be a very happy lady tonight. He ran to me and lifted me onto his back.

He ran to a cabin in the back of the house. It was very warm. I was sweating when we stepped in. He set me down on the ground and started to kiss me. I shivered, he thought I was cold…it wasn't that. I was happy. He looked at me but I jumped up and kissed him. He lost his balance for a second and fro a vampire it was uncommon. But he regained it in a moment's time. He held me close to him tight as could be. My legs were around his waist and he loosened the grip of my legs and set me down again. He didn't stop kissing me. He took off his shirt and he ripped off mine. I heard the tearing of the silk. I smiled because I was winning. He picked me up and got me to a room he shut the door and laid me on the bed. I realized my skirt was off and his pants were off. We were just in our underwear. Witch I knew wouldn't last long. He went to my neck and kissed me, he kissed me all the way down to my belly button then back up. He got to my lips again. He crossed over all the boundaries he had. It was already so magical. Us together. Soon it would be us together in a way that is shared when you truly love someone. He would know me like no one else. Only him. He then stopped and ran into a different room. I don't know what I did. I started to cry. He heard me. He came in and wrapped me in his arms. I realized that he had clothes back on. And I was completely naked. I wrapped the blanket around me.

"Bella, I am so sorry. I lost control. And if I didn't stop, I could have hurt you. I don't know what came over me. I shouldn't have brought you here. I should have controlled myself better. I let my male-ness come out. I am sorry."

"Don't be sorry. I don't care if I were to get hurt. I want you, all of you and now. Right now. Not later. NOW! Please Edward we came so close. Why did you suddenly stop!? Edward I love you and I want to show you just how much I do."

"I stopped because it occurred to me what we were doing, I almost didn't stop. But I know what could have happened. And Bella I want you too. But not yet. We have to wait so I don't hurt you."

"But Edward-"

"Bella not now. We can have this conversation later. I promise but please, you don't understand how upset I am."

"Fine. Get me clothes now. Please."

He left and came back with sweats and a shirt. I put them on immediately, and I asked him to bring me home. He did. I took a shower and put on my pajamas. He was lying on the bed. I crawled up next to him and kissed his cheek. He apologized yet again. I nodded and said me too. He looked upset and I knew he was and so was I.

"Edward, what is that cabin for?"

"It's for us. You didn't get to see the whole thing, but it is beautiful and Esme and I were working on it for after the wedding. That's why I left before. I guess now the surprise is gone."

"Not really all I saw was you and the bed. I can wait until after we are married to see the whole thing."

"Okay, but I think it is time for you to go to bed. You have school in the morning."

"Okay. I love you Edward, I will see you in the morning."

"Goodnight baby."

That night he didn't lull me to sleep with my lullaby instead he repeated over and over how much he loved me. I fell asleep into a peaceful dream.

**EPOV**:

I lay beside her. Her sweet face in my sight. It made me smile; I love her so much that it hurts. I regret ever leaving her. And I regret what happened earlier today. I hurt her, again. Her kisses replay in my mind over, and over again. I smile as it goes in my mind. Her every touch her every giggle. Her beautiful body. Everything. It makes me so thankful for her. I can't wait till I can share the most beautiful part of love with her. But I am just scared she will get hurt. The one part of our deal is something I don't want to do. I don't want to turn her. She will loose her soul. But if I don't. I won't have her forever and it is hard to choose. All of a sudden Bella jumped up, wide awake, out of breath. She was just smiling and happy. What happened in that few moments when I was lost in my mind?

"EDWARD!" She was in sobs. "EDWARD! EDWARD!"

"I am right here."

"EDWARD! NO!" What was wrong, was she asleep still? "EDWARD! DON'T PLEASE! NO!"

I tried to wake her but she wouldn't wake. She just kept screaming no. And then she stopped and fell back into bed. She was still breathing. But what happened. What did I do in her dream?


	9. Chapter 8:Is it Real?

I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT IT ALL GOES TO STEPHENIE MEYER!

I know it has been so long since I have written, but I hope it makes sense to you guys. Haha. Thank you to all my readers :)

**BPOV:**

Sleeping next to Edward, I always have good dreams. Always wake with a smile on my face. Tonight, was one of the worst dreams I have had in a very long time. He left me. He said good-bye. Again. What did I do to him to make him leave me? He said he was done, that he couldn't do this anymore. That he didn't love me. Then he left me and let me die. I was cold, stone cold. He was my life, my love, Edward was my world. And it all came crumbling down in a matter of seconds with those words that he uttered from his mouth. "I don't think I can do this anymore Bella, I realize I do not and never did love you. Good-bye." He walked away. And he left me!

I couldn't wake from my dream. I couldn't leave this world in my head. As much as I wanted to wake from this slumber, I couldn't.

I was getting shaken awake. Slowly leaving my dream world.

I see Edward's face. I was relieved. It was really him. It was only just a dream, yet it had seemed so real.

"Are you okay? Bella. Tell me what happened!"

"You left me. You said good-bye, that you were done and that you didn't and never did love me, ever. You left me there to die. You left me there to rot. I turned cold. My heart was breaking. Edward, are you leaving me?" I was in about hysterics as I was telling him all this. His face had pain all across it.

"Bella, I will never leave you again, how many times do I have to tell you that? You are my life. I will never leave your side. Together forever and ever. Till the very end." He was hurt. I was the reason he was hurting. It's my fault. I can never do anything right. I mess up everything.

"Bella." Edward had started. "Your insecurities get the best of you. I am never going to leave you ever again. I love you."

"Edward, I love you too." He engulfed me into a hug and he caressed my cheek as he laid an ever so sweet and gentle kiss upon my lips.

"Do you think you can go back to sleep, you can still squeeze out a few more hours until school in the morning." He smiled, I could tell he was still hurt inside with the thought that any of that would ever happen. But he forced out the grin for me.

"I don't know, I'm wide awake now. Maybe we could go see everyone for a little while?" And with those words he pulled me up in a cradle like position and ran to the house. It wasn't till we stepped through the door that I realized I was still in my pajamas. I started up the steps to go and see Carlisle in his study. I tripped over my foot but Edward caught me giving me a look that read 'Jeez Bella, be careful.' But he let out a little chuckle. I proceeded up the stairs. As I turned the corner to the hall, Emmett came out of his room.

"Bella, no way. Shouldn't the little human be asleep?" He ran up to me and picked me up in a giant bear hug.

"I should, but I couldn't sleep."

"Edward keeping you up and busy?" He said with a wink.

"Emmett go away." Edward said sternly with a glare.

Emmett let out a big hard laugh and walked away back into his room. I was about to knock on Carlisle's office until I heard him say, "Come on in." I stepped into the office, it looked the same as the one in Forks. The books, the desk, and the paintings. The one of the Volturi still hung up. Carlisle turned around in his chair and smiled his nice smile. I heard someone coming in and turned my head. There Esme stood. Carlisle and Esme both came up and gave me a gentle hug. "We've missed you." I told them that I had missed them as well. Although it has only been a day, but regardless. They were family and I miss them all the time.

I stood there talking about how school and such was with them, this time Alice wasn't there to interrupt me. She and Jasper went to go and hunt. After being there for about an hour I started to get tired. My eyes beginning to get heavy, and small yawns escaping my lips. Edward asked if I wanted to go back, and I decided might as well get the two and a half hours left that I can.

Walking out the door to go back to my house. We ran into Alice and Jasper. Alice ran up and tackled me. "Bella! You should be in bed missy!" She said with a little chuckle and a smile.

"Where do you think I'm headed?"

"Come over tomorrow after school!"

"Fine. Now let me go so I can go to bed." She released me. And I said goodnight to Jasper and her as Edward picked me up and put me on his back.

Back at the house. I laid in Edwards arms, slowly falling into a slumber. "I love you beautiful." I tried to utter out the words I love you too. But I was falling deep into sleep. It sounded like a mumble. But he knew what I meant. This time, sleep was good and peaceful.

Waking up in the morning was treacherous. I was so exhausted. I just wanted to go back to bed. But Edward wouldn't let me. He kept pushing me to get up and get dressed. Finally, I was all ready and we left for my classes. He brought me there and laid a light kiss as I left to run to class.

Looks like I was going to be late. I reached the doors right on time. And once again, the only seat left open was right next to Ranger. I sat down and he smiled. "How are you." I grumbled and replied telling him I was exhausted.

"I bet I could help you get some sleep." He winked at me.

"Uhm no, I don't think that would be the best idea. My _fiancée_ is very territorial and he helps me sleep perfectly fine if you get what I am saying." I laughed a little. His face turned red and he apologized.

Ranger added. "If it doesn't work out between you and him, you can always give me a call." As he slipped a piece of paper into my backpack. I guarantee that it had his number on it.

"Sorry, but I'm really not that interested. We are long term." Longer that he will ever know.

Walking out of my Anthropology class to go and meet up with Jake to walk to the dinning hall, I stopped to go to the bathroom. I was the only one in the bathroom. Well at least I had thought. After stepping out of the stall I saw someone at the sink. It was Jenny. She looked at me through the mirror.

"Hey. What's up?"

"Nothing, just got out of class, was going to go to the dinning hall."

"Wait for me, and we can go together."

I waited for Jenny, she had to re-do her make up _of course_. She took her sweet time. So by the time we got to the dinning hall it took forever for me to find Jake. He was a little more upbeat today. He came over to me and gave both Jenny and I hugs and gave me a kiss on the cheek. We ate our food and talked about random things. After we were finished, we all went to our classes. Boring as usual. Ranger decided to show up on my way walking to my car. He stopped me and cornered me trying to get into my truck.

"Bella, I know we kind of had an awkward moment this morning. But I would like to at least be your friend. You seem pretty cool, and you look familiar. I don't know from where, but, you seem really familiar." I had thought the same thing but had never said anything.

"Yeah, I could be your friend. Strictly friends."

"Of course." Ranger had said with a sadistic smile. I know this wasn't going to turn out good. Edward appeared out of no where. He pushed right past Ranger. And came up to me and kissed me passionately as if proving to Ranger that I was his. I turned to him and smiled. His face got red and he looked angry. He stormed off. Guess Edward knew exactly how to tick him off.

I got in my truck and Edward pushed me over to the passenger side. "So what was that all about?" I started.

"I know what he was thinking, and he wants you. And he won't stop till he gets you. Even if your 'just friends' or not. Bella, you have to be careful around him. Please. Don't let him ever get you alone." I could hear the frustration and anger in his voice. The pain on his face was noticeable. I knew he was trying to hide it.

"I will Edward, I promise."

He nodded as I said that. "You better Bella, I will not lose you. I will not let it happen."

Instead of driving to my house we drove to see the family. Edward parked the car and came over to my door and opened it. Whoever said chivalry is dead, surely has never met Edward. We walked to the front door and was greeted by Alice.

"Yay! You didn't bail!" She had said with a big grin.

"Of course not Alice, I would never do that to you." A little sarcasm dripped through that. But I hope she didn't notice. Cause I really wouldn't do that to her. She was still smiling. She took me by the hand and pulled me into the living room. She sat me down on the white couch. I sunk into it. It was so big and soft.

"Why am I just sitting here Alice?"

"Just wait Bella. You are so impatient." So I waited for what seemed to be forever. But Alice came back with a big box. "Where's Edward?" I asked her. "He is in with Carlisle. Now here. Open the box."

I started to unwrap the box, then I pulled the white cover off. In it all I could see was a dark midnight blue color silk material. Alice was damn near jumping up and down.

"Hurry!" I pulled the material up and it was a dress. I stood up so I could see the full length. It went down past my ankles a little. Just the perfect length. It was a low v cut with spaghetti straps that criss-crossed in the back. The straps and the V had sparkly studs. "Alice, are these…diamonds?"

"Yes." She said with a grin."

"Alice, I can't accept this. Why did you get this for me?"

She smiled. "You have to take this because well…Bella, will you be my Maid of honor?" She was grinning from ear to ear.

"Of course I would. But aren't you and Jasper already married."

"Yes, but we want another wedding, it has been years since our last one."

"Oh, are you sure you don't want Rosalie to be the Maid of honor?"

"Bella, she has already been my bridesmaid multiple times, I think she can pass one so my _other_ sister can have a turn." She emphasized other.

"I am honored to be your Maid of Honor, but what if I fall and mess everything up." I started to play scenarios in my head of me messing up their wedding.

"You will be fine. Now can you go try on the dress?"

"Fine." With that, Alice pulled me up the stairs into her and Jaspers room. I started to undress myself and she helped me put the dress on so I wouldn't tear it or ruin it. It flowed over my body perfectly, like a waterfall. It fit in all the right places and looked good in all the right places. I looked beautiful. I started to blush.

"Alice, are you kidding me? This is amazing. I look so different and beautiful! And I can't believe I am going to be your maid of honor!" I was so happy, despite the fear of messing it up; I couldn't believe that she wanted _me_ to be in her wedding let alone being her bridesmaid! I'll have so much to do, but I bet Alice will have it all done.

"Uhm" I started and Alice looked at me. "Where is it going to be, and when? What do I have to do? I've never done this before!" My face must have shown my distress because she came over and wrapped her fragile looking arms around me and hugged me with a tight squeeze. "Don't worry about it, I got it under control, you just have to throw a bridal shower and show up and smile, oh and not fall." She added that last part with a smile and a chime like laugh. "Now its time to take that off so it doesn't get ruined before my wedding and the wedding is going to be in a few weeks in Forks."

My brain started racing. "In Forks? If we go to Forks, Charlie will find out, and realize that I am with Edward and not with Jake. He will be so mad! Oh god, what's going to happen?" I started to get anxious and nervous.

Alice looked at me; she sat me down on her bed, "Do not worry about a thing. I will take care of it all. Charlie will not know that you are around Forks, and he will not know that you are with Edward. Your ruining my mood and making me upset. Can't you just be happy for being my Maid of honor?" She sighed and gave me the puppy dog eyes. "Sorry, of course I am happy for you. I'll try to stop being so worried." I have to be happy for her. She is letting clumsy ole me be her Maid of honor. Truly I was so happy. Edward knocked on the door and Alice let him proceed through the door. He came over placed a kiss on my right cheek and pulled me into a hug.

"What was that for?" Not wanting to leave him arms, I had asked with a smile upon my face.

He looked at me and smiled. "I can't wait to marry you." I glanced at the ring placed on my slender finger. It sparkled in the light, the beautiful diamonds. Edward noticed me looking down at the ring and smiled. He cupped my chin, looked me in the eyes and kissed me quickly on my lips. My blood boiled even at the smallest of kisses. It all came flooding to my face and I blushed. He laughed and smiled my crooked smile. I blushed yet again. I went to stand up, but I tripped over my shoelace but fell right into Edwards lap. My second attempt to stand up was succeeded. This time, Edward stood up with me and wrapped his arm around my waist and led me out of the room. Throughout all that I didn't even notice Alice had left us there by ourselves for privacy I suppose. We walked down into the living room and Esme was sitting on the couch reading a book. She glanced up, made a mental note at her page and spot and shut her book.

"Hello you two. How are you?"

"Just fine Esme. Thank you. I'm actually a little bit hungry so I was going to run home and eat and come back."

"Oh nonsense, I have food I can make you. How does some spaghetti sound?"

"Uhm, that sounds fine. Thank you." Esme got up and scurried into the kitchen. I heard her looking for some pans and the water being poured into the pot.

I looked at Edward. "Why do you guys have food here?"

"Props." That's all he said and he smiled at me. I then understood and nodded at him. We sat down on the couch and he wrapped him arms around me and kissed me. His lips soft upon mine. I closed the little distance there was between us and kissed him harder. I didn't want him to stop. And he didn't. He kept on kissing me. I could feel him start to release. Before he could do that I pulled him by his hair and moved his face as close as it could get. I was beginning to lose my breath, but I didn't want to stop. I was kissing him with so much passion. I hope he could feel it. I heard someone cough awkwardly and I slowly released and looked up to see Esme with a bowl in her hand. "Your food is done." She said with a smile. I blushed knowing she had just caught me and Edward kissing. I took the bowl from Esme careful not to spill the red sauce on me as well as on the white couch.

"Edward" I begun. "When we go to Forks for Alice and Jasper's wedding, are you going to be the one I walk down with? Or someone else?"

"I will be accompanying you down the isle. For the first time, until you and I get married, then that will be the most amazing night of my existence."

I blushed. "I just want to marry you Edward. We don't have to have the cliché wedding ceremony. We can go to Vegas for all I care. I just want to marry you. And fulfill every human experience I can and then become like you, a vampire. So I can live the rest of my life with you. Not grow older. Just be with you."

He caressed my cheek with his hand. "We will soon love. Just wait until the summer. You haven't even told Charlie you are with me now."

"But that doesn't matter; it is between me and you. We can elope."

"As much as I want to call you my wife, we cannot do that. You are just saying that right now. But you would want Charlie and Renee there."

I sighed. He was right. I did want them their, but I just wanted to be with him.

"Eat up so we can go back to the house." I finished up my meal. And we went to go and say good-bye to everyone then headed back to the house.

As we walked into the house, Jake was searching through the refrigerator of course. He looked up with a smile to me and a disgusted look to Edward. "Do you understand how bad it reeks in this house because of you?" He looked angry. "Jake, stop it! This isn't needed right now."

Edward looked at Jake, "Do you understand how bad it smells of wet dog in _here_."

"Both of you stop, I love you both and I will not tolerate fighting between you two"

They both looked towards me and muttered their apologies. "Thank you. Now, where is Mandi?"

"She is at Jenny's she will be over later, but I might just go over there."

"Okay, have fun. Do you want me to make you something to eat?"

"Yeah, I guess. Thanks."

"Your welcome, now get out of the kitchen so I can make you food. What do you want?"

"Anything is fine."

Jake left and went into his room, I heard him turning on the television. I pulled out chicken as Edward took a seat at the kitchen table. "Aren't you going to miss all these foods Bella?"

"I guess, but I'd rather be with you, food doesn't really matter in this situation." I said with a little chuckle. I breaded the chicken and threw it into the oven. I started the vegetables and potatoes. As all the food was cooking I took my book from the shelf "Wuthering Heights" I sat on the couch and Edward came and picked me up and placed me on his lap. I got lost in the pages of the book as Edward traced circled along my back and played with my hair. I heard the buzzer and I pulled out the food and called for Jake. He came running out and grabbed his food. "Thanks Bells!" He had a huge grin on his face. If anyone needed to get on his good side you just got to make him some food.

"Jake, can you sit down I want to talk to you." His face got serious, like something was wrong. As Jacob sat down I looked at him closely, of course I loved him, but not as much as I love Edward and there was no way I could ever love him more than Edward. "What's the matter?"

"We need to tell Charlie and Billy that we are not together anymore, I can't keep lying to him, and I want everyone to know that I am with Edward." His face got hard, although he may be with Mandi, he is still angry with me and Edward. I feel so bad. I had never wanted to hurt him. That was the least of my intentions.

"When?" Just one single word he asked.

"Alice and Jasper are getting married in a few weeks and I am her Maid of honor so we are all going to Forks, if you and Mandi could come, we could calmly explain to Charlie and Billy about this situation."

"Explain what!" He started to get angry. "That you are with a bloodsucker. Wait, I mean vampire. Sorry. Actually, no I'm not. Bella, I may not be as mad, and I may have found someone that I will never live without. But you still hurt me. It still hurts to know that you left me for him before I was even with Mandi. What were you going to do, sneak around behind my back? I would have figured it out. The horrid stench for one. And for the fact that you would never be here with me. It hurts still, the wound is fresh. Believe me it is healing. And I don't want to be weak and look stupid. But I do love you. I always have and always will. It's like Sam and the whole Emily and Leah situation. He still hurts about hurting her, except I never hurt you. And he still loves her. But Emily has this power to him, he can't live without her. Just like me and Mandi. I can not live without her. I can not live a day knowing she is not in this world. If it is what you want. If the time is right for you. I will see if Mandi will come, and we will tell them.

I was stunned. I couldn't believe he just blew up on me like that. Jake of all people, yelling at me. It hurt me inside knowing this is how he felt. I wanted to give him a hug, but I was afraid to touch him.

"I love you too Jake, I always will. You have been there for me for year upon year, and still you haven't left me. I love you." I saw Edward wince when I told Jake I loved him. I ignored it. "I never meant to hurt you. Sometimes things just happen. I feel the same way to Edward that you do to Mandi. Thank you for telling them with me. And explaining it. When I find out everything I will tell you."

"Okay." Jake replied with a monotone voice. I reached over to give him a hug. He hugged me tight. It still felt like a shelter to me. His big strong arms. He does mean a lot to me. I just won't ever be with him. Edward is my love. The one I want to spend eternity with.

After Jake left, me and Edward just sat talking and I was reading. I was exhausted, I feel asleep on the couch in Edwards arms. I felt him lightly kiss me on the forehead and I realized he brought me into my room and we were lying on the bed. I mumbled out and I love you and I heard him whisper in my ear "I love you too, sleep well." Like every other night, he lulled me to sleep with the lullaby he made me so many years ago.

I dreamed of us together, me walking down the isle. In a white big beautiful dress. Charlie accompanying me. I saw everyone I loved sitting in the chairs watching me elegantly walking down. Down the isle to meet the man I love, Edward. I was going to become Isabella Cullen. That name gave me butterflies in my stomach. Just like a little giddy girl. I still loved that feeling. I was smiling through my tears that were running down my perfectly made up face. It was perfect dream. Ended with the 'I do' that we both got to say and the first kiss of the rest of our lives.


End file.
